How long should a couple date each other before getting married? This has been the question on the lips of the few young adult I counseled this past week.

Two years is enough to date your partner and settle down with him or her. Anything beyond that to me, means you’re not financially ready or you have doubts about marrying your partner.

No matter how long you date each other, there is no guarantee you will know everything about your partner or totally understand him or her.

You have to live with someone or experience a particular situation with the person before you can truly understand the way they react to individual situations.

Even if you dated someone for five years before getting married to him or her and you think you know this person very well, you will still experience a rude shock when she exhibit an attitude you least expect of her

Some people dated for six months, settled down and their marriage worked out fine.

Other couples who got married after six months of dating, ended up in a fiasco. Some people will say it is luck but I will say it’s a two way thing.

I’ve also seen people dating for as long as seven years, before getting married and they separated at last. Some even broke up before they could plan a wedding, while others were able to have a successful marriage.

Suffice to say, it is not how long but how well. I think the border line period should be two years. Two years is relatively enough to know the basics about a person and to make up your mind, if the person is worthy of your love forever.

You will be cheating yourself, if you go longer than that and end up separating after investing so much into the relationship both physically and emotionally.

If you’re not ready for marriage within two years of dating, let your partner know. Open up your intention. Do the honourable thing and don’t deceive anyone into believing you have the noble intention of marrying him or her, when you don’t.

Like I said in my last post, know what you want from your relationship. If it’s not happening as it should be, please don’t waste your time anticipating it will happen some day soon.

This is about you, you should understand the difference between been patient and wasting time.


      1. I didn’t have anyone to counsel me, when I was younger and it affected my relationship choices. That’s why I decided to train as a counselor to aid young people. I really appreciate your visit and comment, it is very encouraging.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Isn’t it so true about the importance of parenting and mentoring our younger generations. Like the Bible says for women to mentor the young women. I spent 39 years in the field of counseling and the stories are many. It is so good you are posting on this topic and sharing you with us.

        Liked by 1 person

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