Sex is used in many forms of relationship as a tool. It is used as a tool of entrapment. A tool for revenge and blackmail. Sex is also use as a tool of harassment and inducement. Sex workers have continued to use it as a tool to make money.

I can write pages on this topic but l want to limit my discussion on the part that interest me most and makes me uncomfortable. That is using sex as a tool for revenge and blackmail by couples.

When we are upset or mad as hell at our partner, some of us tend to seek revenge using sex as a tool. We deny our spouse or partner sexual pleasure at that point, mostly to express how hurt we are or to whip them back on line.

I don’t think it is necessary or advisable for couples to deny each other sex out of anger. I know it can be tough to feel sexy when you’re in a sour mood and people may see this as normal because they are hurting at that time and feel justified, but l do not see it in that way.

We should separate passion from our anger. Couples should not fuel issues by denying each other sex each time they get into a fight. It should not be used as a form of punishment, moreover having sexual contact while having a misunderstanding can quickly help resolve issues between loving couples.

Taking sexual revenge too far, sometimes lead to break up or infidelity. I wish to discourage it and suggests that sex should not be used as a tool for revenge among couples. Seek better ways to resolve issues that doesn’t involve sex.

Some people also use sex to blackmail their partner to get what they want. I’ve seen lovers blackmailing themselves into submission. For example a partner can make unrealistic demand or ask for gifts etc, which ordinarily a spouse or a partner can not afford or may not wish to buy for them. Knowing their sexual pleasure is at stake, they sometimes go out of their way to please them.

Blackmailing a partner by using sex as a tool, may appear harmless and playful to some partner, but l don’t think it shows a genuine affection on the part of the blackmailing spouse. It is best to stop using sex as a tool in a committed relationship, in fact in any form of relationship.

Let sex stand for what it is, love and passion. Not a tool for revenge, blackmail and whatever. Fight or no fight, gift or no gift, the show must continue. Don’t turn your back on your partner in bed. Sex must continue between two loving couples, no matter how angry we are. It makes for a better and a healthier relationship.

Would you use sex as a tool for blackmail, revenge, entrapment, etc. Yes or no, take the poll or leave your comment. It will be fun to know some of my readers views.

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